The Sixty Quirks of Witches and their Ilk

I have written about witches; they gain these things as a reward for doing awful witch things more often, like spell rituals and cavorting with elves and stealing secrets from the dead and all that other shit. This is the working draft I've been using in play-testing. So far so good.

Roll a D6 (for the column) and a D10 (for the row). I will paste these and then go to a party.

	ONE (1)
1	Speak with Animals (yes/no, D6 questions)
2	Spoil/wilt plants with a touch
3	Grow/flower plants with a touch
4	Appears as very old to children, elves, and sporadically (1 in 12, for just a moment) to strangers
5	Appears as very young to children, elves, and sporadically (1 in 12, for just a moment) to strangers
6	Has worms, beetles, roaches, tentacles, mice or spiders living amongst hair/attire
7	Symbols of loyalty (brangs, rings, flags, etc.) fall off, fade or distort in presence
8	Domestic dogs bark fearfully/angrily at the witch
9	Cause warts/boils on children for D12 days
10	Can smell magic - it smells like rust and forests or  contempt and rain or blood and swamp or sweat and misery

	TWO (2)
1	Has a constant odour of rust and forests or  contempt and rain or blood and swamp or sweat and misery
2	Has eyes of different colours
3	Large, hidden witch/birthmark of moon, lightning, wilted hound, lump/growth, raven, spider, etc.
4	Small obvious (face, hand etc.) witch/birthmark of moon, lightning, wilted hound, lump/growth, raven, spider, etc.
5	Spoils domestic milk and eggs in presence
6	Very young domestic animals quickly sicken and die in presence
7	Very old domestic animals become pregnant/gravid in presence
8	candles/flames flicker in presence
9	candles/flames change hue in presence
10	bugs/worms/something appear in nearby meals (~ 1 in 12)

	THREE (3)
1	The air is uncommonly cold around the witch
2	With a touch, can imbue (or remove) a sense (or their voice) into one animal/familiar. Creature must be no larger than a fox, and will remain/skulk nearby the witch if dismissed. If the familiar is killed while so imbued, the witch loses thing forever.
3	Eyes sporadically (~ 1 in 12 conversations) take on cat, lizard, or goat traits. Witch can blink them away once aware they are showing.
4	Unnaturally agile, bendy, and long. Cat or fox-like. This is unsettlingly obvious during surprised or athletic movement.
5	Cultivated gardens slowly develop brambles, vines, and become overgrown (effects noticeable in D12 hours; impenetrably overgrown in D12 days).
6	Cannot be deliberately burned
7	Cannot be deliberately drowned
8	Has unnatural intuition for healing mundane wounds, illnesses (not plagues), with uncommon/unusual natural components
9	Weighs the same as a duck
10	Accidentally seductive - 1 in 12 people fall in love, complete with jealousy, adoration, possessiveness, sacrifice, etc.

	FOUR (4)
1	Straw-like hair
2	Unusually warty
3	Tongue like a Magpie, Serpent, forked, etc.
4	Spellcasting is: Impossible if > 1 month without naked sexual/sensual engagement with another; Difficult if between 1 and 4 weeks without sex/etc.; Normal if sex/etc. within a week; Easier during sex/etc.
5	Gangly & gaunt
6	Can impregnate/be-impregnated-by anything alive
7	Made of wood
8	Allergic to sweet foods
9	Is burned by salt
10	Long pointed nose

	FIVE (5)
1	Has a minor 'gravitational' pull on objects made of one of the following: (1) silver; (2)magic; (3)natural ingredients; (4)iron; (5)blood; (6)everything
2	Can only eat one of: sandwiches; plants; flesh (innocent flesh can nourish for a moon); Gruel/stew; Vermin/weeds; Cakes
3	Unnaturally talented at crafting potions of various effects (love, poison, healing, sadness, courage, allergies, sleep, levitation, mutation, in/fertility, etc… witchy things.)
4	Extra long fingers.
5	Fingertips like needles/pins
6	Followed, observed, and reported on by a black cat, raven, fox, pheasant, badger, or goose ( or some other animal no larger than a fox)
7	Has the reflection of a black cat, raven, fox, pheasant, badger, or goose ( or some other animal no larger than a fox)
8	Is very beautiful. Is very, very, maliciously envious of anyone more beautiful. (~ 1 in 100 people)
9	Sickly green flesh, or grey dead skin. Slight scent of decay
10	Cannot sleep in the same room/place twice. (Moving caravans are Ok.)

	SIX (6)
1	Grows feathers, quills, fur or scales instead of body hair, and randomly elsewhere.
2	Area around where the witch sleeps has magical disguise of being pristine and beautiful
3	Area around where the witch sleeps has magical disguise of being awful and wretched
4	Cycles through quarterly cycle of prepubescence, adulthood, postpubescence, for one moon each.
5	Cannot be submerged.
6	Grows wart somewhere on body when lied to (not necessarily aware of them)
7	Touch smoulders flammable items (unless wearing gloves)
8	Touch is freezing (unless wearing gloves)
9	Gets shorter as they get older; does not suffer other ill effects of old age or die of 'natural causes'
10	Cackles instead of laughter

Ok I think that's all of them.

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New Feierland Merchants: The Woodturner

The drafts of my preposterous equipment lists continue somewhat apace. I'm going to tweak a bunch of the prices - I want there to be a big old discrepancy between rich people stuff and poor people stuff. There need to be spices that can buy farms, you know? I'll do that on the next pass. In the mean time, here are a bunch of nice wooden things. There's enough in there to help build the setting in the imagination of the beholder, I think, and enough odd things and services to inspire people to play creatively and entertainingly.

I played with another new group the other day - 3 players who'd never played RPGs before + my girlfriend. They really enjoyed looking through the madness that is my equipment list and buying a bunch of dumb things. I was happy.

BEGINNERQUEST: Patron Jon Shortchange of The Reprehensiblers informs all Hectors and Bovver-Boys that rumours and mistruths about the moonlight activites of his fellowship are somewhat exaggerated. All beasts involved in Reprihensibler meetings are guaranteed to be dead BEFORE the beginning of the festivities. A Reward of 175 g, a set of painted playing-cards, and a spade is offered to anyfolk whom can sharply identify the source of these rumours.

Woodturner			Woodturner (cont.)
Meusmador of Boldbarn - 22 y.o. Gambler			Meusmador of Boldbarn - 22 y.o. Gambler
Services	Cost (g)		Services	Cost (g)
Secret Compartment (by size)	9 - 110		Custom chess set	~ 245 - 425
Identify wood	~ 10		Fixtion of damage item	~ 2 per hour
Embellish/engrave (paper size)	~ 5 per section		Craft religious icon (fist sized)	~ 40
Load dice	~ 5 per dice		Carve mandrake  to likeness	~ 100
Statue buildening	~ 100 per m2
Woodmending	~ 3 per hour
Item	Cost (g)		Item	Cost (g)
Hardwood (e.g. Bridgewood,	50 per m2		Frank-Ash Lamellar (full suit)	46
Embleton Oak, Frank-Ash)			Carved likeness	49
Softwood (e.g. Wolderwood,	30 per m2		Bed	50
Terric Pine, Nibbling Willow)			Plough	53
Crookwood (e.g. Bloodwillow,	35 per m2		Block & Tackle	60
Red Yew, Gravebud)			Snail-throne	62
			Sled	75
Craft of Bone or Horn	x 0.75		Cart	115
			Mandrake root	115
Dice	2		Goat-chariot	133
Spoon or fork	2		Cabinet	~ 150
Cup	3		Chess set (Beasts vs Birds)	163
Tentpole (3 m)	4		Wagon	265
Oar	5
Funeral stake	5		Beehive frame (each)	3
Basket	5		Beehive, empty	10
Bucket	6		Wicker/Strawman, small	4
Stool	7		Toothpicks (fistful)	5
Scepter or rod	9		Rolling-pin	2
Chair	10		Smoking pipe	5
Ladder (3 m)	10		Horn (Hunting)	15
Scrollcase	11
Coffin (basic)	12
Barrel	15
Cage, for bird or mudrat	15
Flotsam figurine (Pirate, etc.)	17
Feierlish strugglebox	22
Wheel	22
Chair of swooning	25
Door	26
Headcage	26
Wheelborough	27
Strange carved fetish	33
Chest or trunklike object	35
Skis	36
Yoke	42
Bench or Tabling Device	43

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New Feierland Merchants: Pantellow & Tabardier; Pyrographer

I feel like the Pantfellow & Tabardier is set up quite well to produce some fun role-playing and adventure. Every adventurer likes to set up their outfit just so, while the character of the vendor (as implied by the services offered and political enthusiasm) is likely to take the conversation somewhere fun, you know? Similarly, the Pyrographer offers burned magpies and dogs as part of his regular stock. He will also burn stuff for not-much money, which is obviously great. Curiously, these two vendors haven't yet been substantially interacted with in my playtests, but I have pretty high hopes.

In other news: Borric Hagborn wishes it known that whichever Poorly-Demeanoured Bootworm has acquired possession of his Prized Bale of Straw is now the similarly proud owner of a 100 goat bounty. These is no amnesty with which to bargain.

Pantfellow & Tabardier		Pyrographer
Faiol Nir - Flirtatious 66 y.o. Politics enthusiast		Rolfe Mannering - 42 y.o. Leatherclad Alcoholic
Services	Cost (g)	Services	Cost (g)
Hidden pouches and pockets	x 2	Arson	200 or more
Embroid or beautify	Client's choice	Burn thing	~ 20
Quick-release	x 1.5	Identify burned thing	10 +
Unsolicited fashion advice	No charge	Burn animal	~ 10
Burn heinous attire	No charge
Customised outfit	Client's choice
Item	Cost (g)	Item	Cost (g)
Oakthistle (to craft/per m2)	x 0.5 / 4	Rushlight	1
Linen (to craft/per m2)	x 1 / 10	Torch (6)	1
Goat (to craft/per m2)	x 3 / 24	Lantern oil (pint)	2
Furs (to craft/per m2)	x 7 / 60	Tar (per litre)	3
Sarsanet (to craft/per m2)	x 10 / 75	Dustpan	3
		Charcoal (per kg)	5
Needles/pins	1	Brush	5
Buttons/hooks (half dozen)	2	Flint & Tinder	7
Thread (small roll)	5	Tallow candle (per kg)	7
Dyes (for ~ 1 item)	15	Burned finch	7
Socks (pair)	3	Burnt skunk	12
Undergarments	3	Coal (per kg)	15
Sash/Scarf	5	Burned magpie	19
Turban	5	Open Lantern	25
Purse or pouch	6	Smoldust (Light w/o air; pint)	25
Belt (fine or broad)	6	Burnt skull of elk	27
Sack	7	Burned warthog	28
Gloves (pair)	8	Hooded lantern	35
Vest	9	Bellows	36
Hat or cap	9	Volcanic lard (pint)	40
Veil, coif or hood	9	Burned dog	42
Girdle	10	Beeswax candle (per kg)	50
Tunic or blouse	12	Mirrored lantern	75
Drapery or net	12	Waterproof lantern (smoldust)	88
Kilt/Skirt	13	Lava (per litre)	650
Jerkin	13	Quicklime (powder, fistful)	15
Suspenders	14
Shirt	16
Tabard/Surcoat	17
Trousers or leggings	19
Scapula or smock	19
Pack	22
Blanket, rug or towel	24
Cape	27
Jacket	29
Robe or gown	30
Gown	35
Coat	36
Cloak or mantle	37
Dress	42

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Rewards For Party's First Quest (D66, roll a few times)

	Weaponry & Arms		Attire & Armoury
11	Piece of timber, or goblet on to a stick	21	Large sack, woven of oakthistle
12	Rusted spade or hoe	22	A long, tattered scarf or sash
13	Longdagger, crude but sharp	23	Swamp-boots, very few holes
14	Muddy pitchfork or scythe	24	Tabard or surcoat, stained with grime
15	Warhammer, scratched	25	Linen coat or cloak, singed
16	Poleaxe, tassled	26	Stuffed linen armour, odorous
	Liquids & Miscibles		Tools & Articles
31	Jug of Grog, Nauseating	41	Loose bundle of torches
32	Vial of black ink	42	Damp length of rope, 10 m
33	Flask of doglock (2 hits worth)	43	Crowbar or saw, weathered
34	Cruickshank's Fae-brewn whiskey, jug	44	Open lantern, with 2 pints of oil
35	Pot of Lye or Volcanic Lard	45	Digger tool (shovel/pick contraption)
36	Laudanum	46	Trade tools (pick one of your skills)
	Trinkets & Esoterica		Provisions & Victuals
51	Set of dice, ox-bone	61	3 Egg & Elderberry pies
52	Playing cards, witchcraft artwork	62	4 Wheels of Woodland Grained cheese
53	Set of charcoal sticks and parchment	63	Leeches, 1 kg
54	Bronze mirror, grease smudged	64	Bucket o' fish
55	Accurate map to unexplored ruins	65	Hogflesh, 2 kg
56	Bear trap, bog-iron	66	Barrel of Fenreed Ale (150 L)

Starting With Nothing

Recently, deliberately, I've been running for people who have either never or rarely played RPGs before. For these players I think that having new PCs start with no equipment, and no more than say 5-25 coins, is a good thing. It's probably good for all players in fact.

By giving the characters ownership of no things, and then presenting with a problem that threatens to take what's left, they are led neatly to a) investigating and interacting with the environment, and b) thinking of interesting solutions. This is Good. It trains them to play the game properly.

The End.

BONUS Extra benefits: 

- Cheap crappy stuff on the equipment list gets looked at; 

- Crappy cheap stuff gets used in interesting ways; 

- All the work you put into making an interesting and expansive equipment list isn't wasted; 

- You can use all sorts of shit as treasure now;

- Treasure is fucking great; 

- Desperate PCs who see themselves as victims of vast relative inequality will, like real life, turn to crime which, unlike real life, is almost always hilarious and fun;

- You can do really fun quests with stupid NPCs who have great accents and no real power, since whatever meagre rewards you're offering for dealing with those morons is better than anything the PCs own;

- Playing NPCs who are basically variations of the peasants from Monty Python Holy Grail is lots of fun;

- PCs will scavenge the dead with voracity;

- Some other stuff;

- Girlfriend is on the phone now.

New Feierland Merchants: Prostheticist & Skinworks

Probably your players will have their characters do something that loses them a limb or a face or something. It behoves you to give them something to look forward to by offering them at least a few interesting options for replacement. This is only a draft, but it's a solid first step. Also people want to buy stuff made from leather so here's that too.

In other news: The Mayor of New Feierland wishes it known that the recent and infamous executions enstaged by the Unproductive Navvies envermining the dockyards are subject to condemnation of unsurpassable sincerity. Rampant and unsactioned murder will continued to be considered as unsocial behavior of above average seriousness. Citizens are reminded that their human neighbours are the only human neighbours within practicable reach. The Fae Menace hates our way of life. Exercise vigilant bigotry where appropriate.

Prostheticist		Skinworks
Margaret Fearraigh - Spiteful 34 y.o.		Wilmaer Wormsson - Charming, Tattooed 20 y.o.
Services	Cost (g)	Services	Cost (g)
Incorporate strenge treasure	~ 15	Cure beast hide	5 - 20
Incorporate strenge creature	~ 50	Hidden pouches and pockets	x 2
Amputation & Burning	~ 5	Embossed, fanciful	Client's choice
Customised prosthetic	x 1.5	Fire-resistant	x 3
Commission artwork	40 - 400	Create Skinmask	~ 15
		Quick-release	x 1.5
Item	Cost (g)	Taxidermification	~ 7 - 50
Craft of Steel	x 4	Item	Cost (g)
Craft of Silver	x 50	Craft of Stronghide	x 2
Eyepatch	10	Tanned leather	7 per m2
Foot		Fishleather	8 per m2
Simple wood	10	Tanned Stronghides	16 per m2
Hook or spike	25
Weapon or tool	34 + items	Pouch, generalised	3
Lockable or lodestone	93	Strop	4
Articulated	277	Wallet or Purse	5
		Wine/Waterskin	5
Hand		Collar	5
Simple wood	15	Baldric	6
Hook or spike	35	Shoes or Sandals (pair)	7
Weapon or tool	46 + items	Belt	8
Lockable or lodestone	127	Scroll or Book case	8
Articulated	384	Skullcap	14
		Satchel or Goat-Tote	14
Face Part		Majestic sculpture of owl	15
Simple wood	30	Top hat	15
Hook or spike	50	Gloves (pair)	16
Weapon or tool	66 + items	Broad hat	17
Lockable or lodestone	135	Backpack	18
Articulated	406	Livestock Harness	18
		Twisted sculpture of elk	19
Leg		Boots (pair)	21
Simple wooden peg	50	Unsettling sculpture of child	22
Hook or spike	70	Vest	26
Weapon or tool	82 + items	Swamp-boots (Waders)	33
Lockable or lodestone	177	Breeches	38
Articulated	429	Longcoat	93
Arm		Taxidermied wren	16
Simple wood	65	Taxidermied rat	17
Hook or spike	85	Taxidermied other rat	19
Weapon or tool	113 + items	Taxidermied serpent	21
Lockable or lodestone	263	Taxidermied carp	22
Articulated	753	Taxidermied marsupial	23

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New Feierland Merchants: Earthenware & Stongemonger; Glassier

Modest yet mysterious; rustic and eccentric. Earthenware, Stonemongery and The Glassier! Enriched adventurers ought to find plenty of odd things to waste their curiously earned coins on in these fine establishments. If nothing else, the perusal of such may help to inspire in players a greater understanding and investment in the lands they explore.

In unrelated news, the Town Crier wish it known that reports of Invisible Elven Necromancers are likely Highly Exaggerated. Citizens are reminded that panic or other forms of Unjustified Negativity are illicit. Furthermore, rapport with The Loquacious Or Otherwise Misbehaving Dead is illicit. Any Deceased Citizens found ambulating Beyond the stipulated boundaries of The Graveyard are to be either Destroyed Or Captured before being transported in an Approved Crate to The Sanitarium.

Earthenware & Stonemonger			Glassier
Barda Chyfles - 70 y.o. skeptic			Pepin the Gypsy - 30 y.o. alcoholic
Services	Cost (g)		Services	Cost (g)
Chimney installation	~ 21 per metre		Lantern reconstructuration	5 per lantern
Repair & reconstructory	~ 3 per hour		En-Mirror item	15 (plus mirror)
Statue crafting	~ 600 per m3		Craft fake jewel	~ 20 - 40
Impress law unto stone	1 per word		Fill with molten glass	30 per litre
Derive facial mould	~ 10 per face		Identify strange glassware	~ 10 - 60
Item	Cost (g)		Item	Cost (g)
Granite Block ~3 tonnes, 1 m3	326 per m3		Craft of Fulgurite	x 20
Granite (~ 33 cm cube, 100 kg)	12 per block		Craft of Obsidian	x 5
Marble	as granite		Stained Glass	~ 100 per m2
Serpentine	x 2		Windows	~ 20 per m2
Ironstone	x 0.5		Glass bead	1
Seastone (lime)	x 0.3		Beverage glass	4
			Beaker	5
Bricks (3 kg each)	1 each		Small bottle/vial/flask	7
Bowl or plate	2		Glass brooch	10
Small flask	2		Mirror of small surface	10
Dice of stone and clay	2 each		Glass shardings, empouched	10
Ceramic jar	3		Hollow'd, shattering knife	10
Mugs	3		Health-eggs	13
Pot, jug or pitcher	4		Marbles, empouched	15
Vase or urn	5		Glass pottery	15
Whetstone	7		Phallus or meditation rod	15
Clay hat	9		Serpent, en-coiled	20
Clay lamp	10		Glass stallion	25
Crucible	12		Wineglass that is a squid	25
Stone bludgeon	14		Decorated flask	25
Grindstone	17		Greenglass dagger	26
Jug shaped like an Owl	17		Prism which fits in a hand	30
Mortar and or pestle	17		Glass bear, a-roar	35
Pig-shaped pot	17		Leathercup goggles	39
Granitite axe	19		Spiralling, confusing ornament	42
Pot; Man whose head en-lids	19		Hourglass	45
Jug which is an ox	24		Chalice or Goblet	50
Urn; half of a pregnant woman	25		Apothecarial Calcinator	60
Millstone	250		Aquarium, middling	65
Bricks (3 kg each)	1 each		Apothecarial Still	75
Tiles for a roof or floor, laid	10 per m2		Mirror of folksized proportions	78
Ventland Ranks game tiles	13 per set of 17		Apothecarial Retort	100
			Apothecarial Alembic	140
			Magnification lense	220
			Chess Set - Feierland v Elves	225
			Spectacles for Humans	410
			Spyglass	1,346

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